Single girls, get thee a hockey stick!

The Golden Girls - before the big game!

Far be it from me to offer dating or relationship advice; The fact that I found a dude and managed to keep him is purely fluke and has no basis in any kind of logical process. However, I can say without hesitation that if you are a girl trying to meet lots of guys, you should play hockey. At the very least, you should get some hockey equipment and carry it around with you.
Ever since I started playing hockey, it has become impossible to leave the house with my gear and avoid being noticed and spoken to by random dudes. Everything from an appreciative nod to the asinine: "Do you play hockey?" (No, buddy, this is a soccer stick.) My personal favourite was as I was leaving the rink (which is indoors) during the summer, and this guy says, "Isn't it a little hot for hockey?" I agreed with him that yes, it was, and gave him a "silly-me" smile and shrug. I have even considered having a T-shirt printed that reads, my hockey equipment is not an invitation to conversation. I wondered aloud to a fellow chick-hockey-player whether or not any other sporting equipment might elicit a similar response. A lacrosse stick, perhaps, or soccer cleats. We figured if you were fully kitted out--like, in cleats, those floppy shorts, and holding a soccer ball--then people would for sure be all, "Hey, soccer!" the way they are all, "Hey, hockey!" Sigh. On my way to practice I now brace myself for the onslaught, and leave the house with my cold-bitch shields at Full. This is because the attention is unwanted. If I wanted to meet guys, hey, breaking the ice has been accomplished! Lots of guys play hockey, and out of the ones that don't, a goodly portion of them enjoy watching it. You already have something in common! I have determined that for the ultimate in attention-getting, a girl should take her hockey equipment with her when she goes out with her girlfriends to Hooters. The intoxicating combination of sporting gear and tits drives the dudes wild! They eventually give up hitting on the waitresses, and hey, there you are!
Furthermore, if you do indeed play, then you might get the exciting opportunity to go to a tournament. Men everywhere! Pumped full of adrenaline and beer! How can you not score?
The reason I'm thinking about this right now is that this weekend I played my first real, entire game of hockey. It was killer, and I'm still sore all over, but it was also incredibly awesome. (Another thing, if you are a woman who plays hockey, it immediately makes you the awesomest. Thank you very much.) I'd go into it, but Jessica, my partner in the adventure, describes it all perfectly here.
We won, although it had nothing to do with my contribution to the game (mainly as an obstacle for players on the other team to skate around) and everything to do with our fabulous goalie. But it re-fired my passion to play, and I'm encouraging women everywhere--especially the single ones--to join in!

The winning team! (I'm clearly exhausted)