Mr. Plumber is my homeboy

Warning: This post contains graphic content that may not be suitable for all readers.

I have just completed the most disgusting household chore ever.
My bathroom sink was clogged and draining really slowly, so I decided to take off the U-bend and clean it out. I know you're thinking: "But wait, you have a husband. Why isn't HE taking off the U-bend (whatever that is)?" Simple. That's just not how it works chez nous. If I wanted that to happen, or anything household-task-related to happen, I would have to nag and nag and nag and nag. Given the choice of turning into an unstoppable nagging bitch, or a man, I have chosen to be manly and complete these tasks myself. Change a lightbulb? Check. Hang a picture? Check. Paint a room? Check? Assemble Ikea furniture? Check. Kill a spider? Check. Open my own jars? Check. Carry one side of a ridiculously large and too-heavy television set because you have your husband erroneously convinced that you're some kind of brawny, capable, uber-chick? Check.
And now: taking off the U-bend.
Got my rubber gloves. Got my wrench. Put a bucket under the sink and started to loosen the nuts (or whatever they're called). I had an inkling that it was going to be ickey when some murky water and a few scraggly, scummy hairs slithered out of the newly-loosen joint. I had no idea just how bad it was. I'm actually gagging a little bit just thinking about it. Sweet Jesus, there was SO MUCH hair! It was all scummy and slimy. And I think there were fingernails!!! I felt like I was pulling an entire desicated corpse out of that tiny little U-bend, one slimy hairball at a time. It was like CSI - only I was discovering just how much I shed. I am frankly in wonderment that I have any hair left on my head. I am so grossed out by my own hair right now that I'm considering shaving my head bald.
I then proceeded to scrub the entire bathroom clean from top to bottom, and then showered to get the last bits of grossness gone.
On the upside - my bathroom sink now drains like a dream!